Comments on: Do You Have A System?

By: Robbie Kramer

Robbie Kramer — Sun, 09 May 2010 16:03:24 +0000

Good noticing Guys! I’m glad you all took the time to do the exercise. Dave – loved it, systemfail – LOL! Einar – notice you did the fantasy land thing a little bit with your response. Just report the details remember! Monish – I didn’t say write your ideal system, I said write about the thing that usually happens. Example of my old system:

1. Open w/ banter – laughter
2. More banter – laughter (wtf is this guy doing)
3. Not enough physical escalation or sexuality (girls don’t get what im doing)
4. Crazy conversation gets boring and girls lose interest
5. Rinse Repeat FAIL

By: Dave F

Dave F — Sat, 08 May 2010 19:13:57 +0000

SYSTEMFAIL (but used very often)
1. Go to a bar with people I know aka friends (this is important because I tend to freeze up whenever I’m alone)
2. Have fun with my friends and shoot the sh!t
3. Look around for an attractive girl while hanging out with said friends
4. Start drinking a lot (get friends to buy)
5. Hope something happens (because my perceived attraction factor is x100 when drunk)

Why it fails –
1. I’m drunk
2. I’m waiting for something to happen and not doing anything to reach my desired outcome.

SYSTEM with my best (but highly limited) success so far
1. Meet girl (usually through a friend)
2. Talk/banter – try avoiding the ‘boring questions’ and making statements for discussion/role play eg. “Oh my gosh, that guy just totally hit on me” (interestingly I really don’t have to make that up a lot of the time)
3. Pretend to be too cool for school by being a little aloof (I think some call this active disinterest).

And here’s where I think I screw up. I don’t make a move. It’s only when looking back that I see all these signs of interest and attraction. My passiveness usually just kills it and probably makes her think I’m not interested at all. It’s all starting to get clearer now but still a work in progress.

By: Einar Coutin

Einar Coutin — Sat, 08 May 2010 04:13:31 +0000

Ok, this is me following the instructions. What? You didn’t think I would did ya?

1.-When I like a girl’s physical appearance I get into a playing instance with her to break that first intimidation by beauty effect.
2.-We then become partners in crime (accomplices) muhahaha.
3.-All this happens when I play and banter mercilessly with her. Guess what Einar? You’re not shy. You’re just afraid of pushing so far you break it.
4.-I start opening up to her. This requires serious doses of honesty and putting yourself in the line of fire. This is when girl stops looking like a Greek Statue and more like a human being.
5.-Testing phase comes in. Questions like: Do you have a girlfriend? arise. This is the part where I usually get scared shit-less and run and screw up. There’s more deep stuff going on in here I just figured out today.
Sometimes girl will play with Jealousy. I still have to work more on handling that. BOTH WAYS.
6.-Tension rises and kiss times comes. This is interesting and very enjoyable part.
7. We enter a cycle of passion and openness and MORE and MORE and MORE and MORE and ad infinitum SHIT TESTING!!! happens. Don’t eat it for breakfast, it will in-digest you.
Just deal with it.
There it is, my system as it has worked.

Addendum: Sometimes, when I’m pushing myself I just go into Contemporary Adult bars and pick on the hot Cougars there with incredibly fast effects. Or is it the other way around? Oh, nevermind. Anyways, knowing how to move your hips in this case, always help.

By: Einar Coutin

Einar Coutin — Sat, 08 May 2010 03:19:51 +0000

When it worked and it REALLY WORKED. I was being my best self, a lot of creativity was involved. I was having fun and I pushed through it. I knew what I wanted and I got it.
What happened?
I got a girl who was engaged.

That was my state of mind. The being. I will have to think about the doing part though. One thing I can tell you though, with me. Lots of feeling are actually involved.

By: Einar Coutin

Einar Coutin — Sat, 08 May 2010 03:17:10 +0000

@A-Dawg Props to you for helping out, with everything! So that's what you called the approachable stance, uh?

By: Brando

Brando — Sat, 08 May 2010 01:38:07 +0000

jk. So i think I do what Robbie does — except usually i get in my way, in my head somehow and come off agenda based:

1. open and have fun
2. be curious about her
3. find some commonalities and try to setup a date

even though its three easy steps, 1-2-3, the core rides on not caring, having fun, not being stuck in your head, being a positive energy.

By: Brando

Brando — Sat, 08 May 2010 01:33:13 +0000

A-Dawg, thats like the easiest system. pffff. here’s what i do:

1. Bring a lion in front of her to scare her.
2. Tame the lion to impress her.
3. Ride the lion, grab her (notice KINO here) and put her on the lion with me
4. Take her home on the lion

100% Guaranteed Attraction, Kiss Close, F-Close, Z-Close.

By: Tweets that mention Create Your Own System to Attract MOBS (members of the opposite sex) -- Topsy.com

Fri, 07 May 2010 23:11:57 +0000

[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Robert Kramer. Robert Kramer said: Create Your Own System to Attract MOBS (members of the opposite sex) http://innerconfidence.com/blog/do-you-have-a-system/ [...]

By: Robbie Kramer

Robbie Kramer — Fri, 07 May 2010 22:48:32 +0000

@A-Dawg See that guys, even women have systems!

By: A-Dawg

A-Dawg — Fri, 07 May 2010 22:43:39 +0000

Even as a woman, I have a system. When I spot a guy I’m into, there’s a particular set of things I do to get him to ask me out. First, I’ll catch his eye a few times, but act like it was an accident. Then I’ll make sure I’m within eyesight and completely ignore him, so that he knows if he wants to talk to me, he’ll have to initiate. If he does initiate, I act like I’m surprised and not sure what to do because I hadn’t really noticed him earlier (which is a lie, obviously, because I planned this whole thing out). If I like what he says to me, I’ll give him my number when he asks. If I don’t like what he says, I’ll tell him no thanks.

It works because it weeds out all those wimpy guys who don’t have the balls to approach