Playing a Smart Game: Strategies on how to make meeting women easy
For years I tried to be a pickup artist, approaching girls all the time, taking bootcamps, struggling and working hard to learn tactics, how to get over approach anxiety. While the efforts have paid off, I’m here to say that there is an easy way. Yes, that’s right. I am here to tell you it’s not supposed to be hard.

Focus on Strengths

As a kid, your parents often tell you “work hard and you can achieve anything!” You can achieve anything but some things will come easy and some will be much more difficult. The truth is, each one of us has our own strengths and weaknesses.  Focus on your strengths, not your weaknesses. Some of us are naturally funny, some of us are great listeners, some of us are great at math. Whatever it is, find ways to incorporate these attributes into your game.

Try Multiple Action Plans
One of the best advice I got recently was from a book called “Rework”. It said something along the lines of “don’t call it a marketing plan or sales plan or business plan — call it a marketing guess or a sales guess or a business guess.” Similarly, all guys who are trying to meet women have their own, what I called Meeting Women Action Plans. For example, a guy will come in saying he wants to only meet women at bars and he’s do that for years often with mediocre success. The biggest error is to stick to one plan for a long time. Even guys who are good at meeting women at, say bars, should be changing up their action plans to see

1. If there is another plan would help them be more successful at meeting women
2. Pushing their comfort zone (if you’re not uncomfortable, you’re not growing).

The cold approach is often one of the hardest things to do (which is why few men ever do it at all in their entire lives!). Try cold approaching for a few months, try being a networking commando, try taking salsa lessons, try running a meetup group. Whatever it is, have multiple plans. Eventually you’ll find something you’re having fun with and meeting lots of women at the same time.

Avoid The Path of Most Resistance.

Oftentimes we take the path of most resistance. We’re trained to do this as kids. “Dont quit!” our parents say. And we keep working harder and harder at things we suck at. It’s called “brute force” as well. Sometimes it works. Often, its just painful.The same is true with meeting women.Seek the path of least resistance.If you’re having massive approach anxiety approaching super hot girls, maybe start off talking to whoever you can. Get used to that. If you hate going to bars and clubs to meet women, stop doing that! Pick something you enjoy doing. Ignore advice that tells you you must be a club superhero, when your history has shown you’re better at meeting women at singles mixers. Work with what you’re good at, then work up.

Recognize you’re style
For some guys being funny is their thing. For others, its having a deep connection. For others its holding tension. Whatever your style is, own it. While a lot of dating advice is geared at making you a more “attractive man” (whatever their concept of an attractive man is), recognize that you have a lot of amazing traits already. Heck, ask us! We’ll point them out for you if you’re having a hard time. Whatever it is, don’t try to be something or someone else. Recognize you have a unique style. Build on what you’ve got.

Cheers,
Robbie Kramer

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