Meet Matthew Vaughn, he’s Claudia Schiffer’s Husband.  She is pregnant in this picture but we all know that her body is insane otherwise!

So how does a guy who looks like that get a girl like her?

Most men would say “It’s because he’s rich! Duh!”  Do you think Claudia needs anymore money?  I think she’s doing quite well on her own and doesn’t have much need to go gold digging.

I’ve never met the guy but just by looking at this picture, you can tell he’s probably not the funniest guy in the world.

So we know that it’s not his looks, it’s not his money, it’s not his sense of humor, so what is it?!

He is GROUNDED!

The best way to describe what being grounded is, is to describe what being grounded isn’t. Read more…

Popularity: 50% [?]

A few months ago I was being interviewed by Vince Kelvin for a short segment for the 2010 PUA World Summit.

One of the other guys on the call was James Marshall. http://thenaturallifestyles.com When James started speaking I was not only really impressed by his content but the energy he conveyed with his voice made me listen even more closely.

So I decided to interview him so I could spread the wealth to my awesome readers and subscribers!

On this podcast James and I discuss some really important topics that aren’t talked about nearly as much as they should in the dating and seduction community.

Topics include:

Read more…

Popularity: 67% [?]

I used to live in San Diego, aka Man Diego because of all the military bases located there.  During the weekends, the troops would infiltrate the local bars and clubs and unfortunately, most of these troops were not comprised of hot women.   The biggest complaint I heard at the bars was “These Marines are so aggressive, I can’t stand them.”  Women would complain that they would get really drunk and hit on them and guys would complain that they were drunk d-bags.  These guys were really just intimidated by the Marines and too scared to admit it.  I have a ton of respect for guys in the military because it takes courage to make that type of commitment.  After working with a lot of veterans, I found that they all tend to have one trait in common, they take action.  And men who take action always get the most out of everything they do.  I’ve never been in battle but I’ve played my fair share of paintball and Counter-Strike back in the day.  When you hesitate and stop to assess the situation, you’re dead!

I recently took a group of guys out to play paintball.  I played a few games by intentionally thinking and assessing the situation and I got shot very quickly each time.  Then I played a few games by silencing my mind and just trusting my body and gut instincts.  My play improved dramatically.  When you are faced with a do or die situation Read more…

Popularity: 64% [?]

I dunno about you, but life is a lot more fun when I’m not thinking too hard.  When we are faced with a tough situation that makes us a little uncomfortable, our built in response is to try and think our way through it.  “If we think hard enough, we’ll figure it out and get it right!”  Unfortunately, this is typically not the case.

One of the biggest frustrations I hear from guys is that they don’t know what to say to start a conversation and keep it going with a beautiful woman. Ironically, the more you think about what to say, the harder time you’re gonna have.  So I decided to do some experimenting.  Rather then trying to figure out good stuff to say, why not just spew out the dialogue in your head?  It’s real, it’s honest and you don’t have to try.

So last night I was out with a client who has been absolutely KILLING IT.  He complains that he doesn’t have nearly enough time to spend with all the women that are calling/texting and practically begging to hang out with him.  Good problem to have right?  He was in town for the weekend so we headed out to Colony, one of the posh new clubs in Hollywood.  When I first walked in I wasn’t really in a social mood at all and I quickly went into my head.  I started thinking about a million things at once and I wasn’t having much fun.  In order to stop thinking, you have to start “doing.” So I started chatting up some of the people at the table we were at.  That got me in a social mode and a few minutes later, I was starting to have a lot more fun.  My favorite thing to do at clubs Read more…

Popularity: 66% [?]

You may have noticed a lot of pushy guys try to con a woman into giving him her number or force his business card on her. If they get the number, they win. If not, they lose. That is why people have a bad reaction to men hitting on women. Women are very savvy to this.

As soon as women feel manipulated or pressured, they will pull away and ignore you. You may or may not be very intuitive and receptive to woman’s signals, but this will help you become more conscious of it, which will make life and dealing with women much easier for you.

Below is a scale called the Attract-O-Meter. On the left side is Aggressive and on the right side is Passive. Most men fall into the “Passive” category.

{ ______________ I __________________}
Aggressive                                                             Passive

Being passive is tragic, because if you are a passive pushover, you rarely increase the sexual tension and ask women to take the next step, thus robbing them of the experience to be with you. At the same time, you dont want to push women away by being too aggressive. The higher quality women will not tolerate this type of behavior and will walk away.

In the Get Hardwired For Success With Women Intensive you get to practice being sexually forward with beautiful women who will give you feedback.

During the workshop we encourage you to be aggressive so you can see just how far to take things. You would be amazed just how aggressive you can be if you are connected to her and picking up on her sexual cues. I have walked up to women and starting making out with them without saying a word numerous times. A gorgeous woman I met in a bar demanded that I take her home to bed after knowing her for five minutes!  I’m not saying this to brag but simply to illustrate what’s possible.  You have more permission than you think you have if you can handle sexual tension. And I’d rather you experience this in the safety of the workshop so you can really push your limits. Because out in the world, you may get a drink thrown in your face or you may get yelled at.

Now, if you are not so bold with people that they occasionally confuse you with an aggressive pushy guy, you are playing it too safe. As a man, you’ve got permission to be upfront with your intentions if you don’t apologize for it.  That doesn’t mean you have to say anything, it’s more of the energy your exuding.  This is different then being attached. Once you get attached, they may pull away. Now, knowing what to do after they pull away is what separates the men from the boys. In fact, many women will intentionally pull away to “test” you to see just how badly you want them.

If you are not willing to fight for them or stick around when things get intense, how can they trust you? Here is the secret: when you start to get attached, simply admit it by calling it out with a smile. “Im feeling a little bit pushy, but how can you blame me? Look at yourself, how can you not expect me to be turned on?” Just by saying it, you can let it go.

At any given time, the woman you are interacting with may be directing her energy toward you or pulling away from you. Dont worry if she is pulling away from you a little bit. As I said before, she may be testing you, and if a woman does not test you, she is not interested. Women fall in love through resistance, and she has to test you to see if she can trust you with her emotions. If she leans away and every time you come crawling back begging and pleading with her to not be upset or angry with you, she will feel smothered and run.

It is okay to stand your ground, even if she is angry with you. Give her the gift of being angry and allow her to experience her emotions; they will pass quickly if you stop resisting them. Rub your hands together until they get hot and then move them so they are six inches apart. Can you still feel the connection between your hands? That’s like the connection between you and a woman. As your connection gets stronger, they will lean in to the point where your fingertips are touching, and then you may say something to trigger them or they will test you and lean away. You never know, but instead of playing tug-of-war with her, you dance with the sexual tension.

How you respond to her energetic lean away and tests will determine how successful you are with women. Unless you have a really strong lean in, do not ask them to take the next step with you!

In other words, the only time you ask her to take the next step with you, whether that be kissing her, getting her number, asking for a date—make sure you have a strong lean in. When the moment is right and she is leaning in, that is when you go for the kiss.

Cheers,

Robbie Kramer

Popularity: 83% [?]

Most people have a very difficult time making decisions.  Sometimes these decisions aren’t that important like a choosing between going to Knotts Berry Farm or Disneyland. But other times, they are hard, like choosing between giving your dieing uncle a kidney or not. Do you wanna know how to make every decision easy?

Trust your gut and GO WITH IT!  If you don’t know what your gut is saying, read on to see if you resonate with some of the examples below.

Let me throw out some scenarios where being wishy washy and sitting on the fence hurts you.

1. Career Choice: What if you don’t know what you want to do with your life? Maybe you are about to graduate college and you need to find a job to make some money and satisfy your nagging parents who just spent $100,000 to put you through school. If you don’t know what you want to do for a career, your best bet is not picking some mediocre job to pay the bills because it will probably suck all your time away. You should choose something that allows you the flexibility to find out what you really want to do, and make a smooth transition into it. Its really not that hard. Read more…

Popularity: 83% [?]

Playing a Smart Game: Strategies on how to make meeting women easy
For years I tried to be a pickup artist, approaching girls all the time, taking bootcamps, struggling and working hard to learn tactics, how to get over approach anxiety. While the efforts have paid off, I’m here to say that there is an easy way. Yes, that’s right. I am here to tell you it’s not supposed to be hard.

Focus on Strengths

As a kid, your parents often tell you “work hard and you can achieve anything!” You can achieve anything but some things will come easy and some will be much more difficult. The truth is, each one of us has our own strengths and weaknesses.  Focus on your strengths, not your weaknesses. Some of us are naturally funny, some of us are great listeners, some of us are great at math. Whatever it is, find ways to incorporate these attributes into your game.

Try Multiple Action Plans
One of the best advice I got recently was from a book called “Rework”. It said something along the lines of “don’t call it a marketing plan or sales plan or business plan — call it a marketing guess or a sales guess or a business guess.” Similarly, all guys who are trying to meet women have their own, what I called Meeting Women Action Plans. For example, a guy will come in saying he wants to only meet women at bars and he’s do that for years often with mediocre success. The biggest error is to stick to one plan for a long time. Even guys who are good at meeting women at, say bars, should be changing up their action plans to see

1. If there is another plan would help them be more successful at meeting women
2. Pushing their comfort zone (if you’re not uncomfortable, you’re not growing).

The cold approach is often one of the hardest things to do (which is why few men ever do it at all in their entire lives!). Try cold approaching for a few months, try being a networking commando, try taking salsa lessons, try running a meetup group. Whatever it is, have multiple plans. Eventually you’ll find something you’re having fun with and meeting lots of women at the same time.

Avoid The Path of Most Resistance.

Oftentimes we take the path of most resistance. We’re trained to do this as kids. “Dont quit!” our parents say. And we keep working harder and harder at things we suck at. It’s called “brute force” as well. Sometimes it works. Often, its just painful.The same is true with meeting women.Seek the path of least resistance.If you’re having massive approach anxiety approaching super hot girls, maybe start off talking to whoever you can. Get used to that. If you hate going to bars and clubs to meet women, stop doing that! Pick something you enjoy doing. Ignore advice that tells you you must be a club superhero, when your history has shown you’re better at meeting women at singles mixers. Work with what you’re good at, then work up.

Recognize you’re style
For some guys being funny is their thing. For others, its having a deep connection. For others its holding tension. Whatever your style is, own it. While a lot of dating advice is geared at making you a more “attractive man” (whatever their concept of an attractive man is), recognize that you have a lot of amazing traits already. Heck, ask us! We’ll point them out for you if you’re having a hard time. Whatever it is, don’t try to be something or someone else. Recognize you have a unique style. Build on what you’ve got.

Cheers,
Robbie Kramer

Popularity: 52% [?]

Do you ever find yourself stuck in situations you’d rather not be in?  About 4 years ago, this was the practically the story of my life.  I hated my job in finance and the majority of my day was spent in boring meetings.  Looking back, I could kick myself for all the missed opportunities that were available if I would have simply applied the secret I’m about to share with you now.

The situations that I dread the most, are BORING ones.  I HATE having to sit through a mindless activity when I would rather be doing something else, ANYTHING else!  The law of attraction states that what we focus on expands and for many years, I found myself stuck in boring situations at an increasingly frequent rate. It wasn’t until I met Karl Wolfe, now one of my most trusted mentors, that things started to shift for me.

Karl called me out one during his weekly class for zoning out.  He said “Are we boring you?” Feeling embarrassed and caught red handed I responded “No, I’m just really tired.”  “Baloney” he said, “you do this every single week and if you keep it up, I’m NOT gonna let you come back.  If you’re doing this behavior in here, you’re probably doing it all the others areas of life so what is the impact, Robbie?”  In that moment I realized how often I zoned out and walked through life virtually “checked out.”  Karl explained that in every moment, there are countless things happening that we could learn from. 

To illustrate this point, let’s take a worst case scenario of being stuck in activity most of us would prefer to avoid.  Let’s pretend we work at McDonalds and we have two options for how we choose to spend out time:

1) We can do the exact minimum amount of work required to avoid getting fired while we constantly glance at the clock waiting for our shift to be over so we can do something more rewarding.

2) We can start to notice all the things that are happening around us that we could learn from. How does the french fryer work?  How do the cash registers operate?  How much money does this place bring in per day and how much is being spent per day.  How does the accounting system work?  What are my coworkers like and why are they working here?  Why does everyone make fun of people who work at McDonalds?  Do they think people like me are stupid? Am I stupid or am I just too lazy to get a higher paying job?

Option 1 will keep us stuck in “Boredom Hell” while option 2 has the potential to open our eyes to something more.  What if we actually used our free time between burger flips at McDonalds to figure out how we could improve the system and make the business run smoother.  We then found a solution and approached our boss to let us be in charge of implementing it.  Do I hear PROMOTION!?!?

So here’s the secret if you haven’t figured it out by now.  Approach every situation as a curious student.  Ask yourself questions that engage your creativity rather then zoning out.  Look at ways to improve things and add value to other people’s lives.

You would think this concept would be an obvious one but look at society.  How many people are actually trying to improve things and create value for others?  Compare that to the amount of people who are just trying to survive and get by comfortably.

When I looked back on my life since graduating college I made an interesting discovery. When my intention in life was to be comfortable, I was usually quite uncomfortable.  But when I switched my intention to serve others and provide value, my bank account starting growing and found myself extremely comfortable by default.  In fact I can’t even remember the last time I found myself in a situation I didn’t want to be in.  And in the rare occasion it does happen, I choose to leave or use the tools I shared above to engage myself and turn things around.  Does it sound like I’m bragging?  Well it should because I AM!   I never thought it would be possible to have the freedom to do whatever I want to, whenever I want to.  But looking back, it was really quite easy once I made this simple shift.

You and I both know that this information is useless unless we put it into action so start by leaving a comment below about the areas in your life where you find yourself bored or stuck.  Next, identify the things that you can focus on instead to add value and engage your curiosity. DO IT NOW!

Cheers,

Robbie Kramer

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Popularity: 47% [?]

In this post, I will explain how you can tap into your passion and creativity to have more fun and create more structure to get things done and accomplish your goals !  You know my motto, if it’s not fun, don’t do it!

If you have ever wondered how you can become more masculine and attractive to women then I suggest reading on.

Let’s use the example of a painting.  If you look at a painting, the frame would be the structure and the painting would be the creativity and passion.  We live in a world of duality, up and down, left and right, masculine and feminine.  So if you want to have more fun you must also add in more structure.

If you only have passion, but no structure or vice versa, you will be a very ineffective person.  For example, let’s say you are really good at being an accountant because you can crunch numbers all day long.  This is a very structured activity because you are accomplishing a pretty mundane task.  If you don’t have access to passion and ability to create, you will struggle to create relationships and your life will be nothing but tedious work.  You will never get promoted because your boss won’t have a connection with you and you will never have any fun because you don’t know what fun is if you are disconnected from your passion.  Conversely, if you have lots of access to your passion and creativity but little structure in your life, you may find yourself without a sense of purpose or direction in life.  You may have a lot of connections and creative ideas, but none of them ever turn into anything.  It’s like the guy who has amazing ideas for a book but never sits down to write it.  So you must be able to turn your creative ideas into tangible tools or information that delivers value to others.

Example: I am really passionate about dating and attracting women, so I blog about it and offer my services to others to help them become more successful.  I get to have fun while getting things done all day long!  So here’s a simple set of strategies to turn this information into transformation by taking action:

Look at the activities that take up most of your time.  Are you getting things done without having fun or are you having a lot of fun but getting very little done?  If you answered the former, you need to add in some passion and creativity and if you answered the latter, you need more structure.  Once you’ve identified it, brainstorm some ideas for adding in the ingredients you are missing.

So how does this relate to you?  Where are you lacking and what is the impact on your life and inner confidence?

Cheers,

Robbie Kramer

Popularity: 18% [?]

In this post I’m gonna share my 4 Step Process for eliminating procrastination! For as long as I remember, I’ve been a procrastinator.  But last week I noticed that I put off some activites and dive right into others.  You’re probably thinking, duh!  Big freakin whoop, Robbie, tell me something I don’t know.  To take it a step further, I realized that I really put off things I don’t know how to get started on.  I remember a few years back when one of my goals was to approach at least 1 beautiful woman a day during my lunch break.  When I first started, I would think of every excuse why not to and I ended up not doing it – procrastination at its finest.

I realized that the biggest excuse I used was “I don’t know what to say.”  The funny thing was that everytime I actually did it, something random just spilled out of my mouth and that excuse was total bullshit but it still stopped me in my tracks.  So I decided to eliminate that excuse by doing the same approach to get started everyday.  I would just find a cute girl, walk up and say “hey this is totally random, but I think you are really cute.” Sometimes I would immedietely walk away, sometimes I would stay and talk and sometimes I would puss out and not do it at all, but I realized that eliminating that excuse, eliminated procrastination.

I also noticed myself procrastinating when it comes to work.  There were a couple documents I needed to create last week pertaining to an upcoming workshop I am leading and I kept putting it off.  I realized that I was putting it off because I didn’t know how to get started.  I noticed what I was doing and decided to try something new.  Rather then trying to push against the resistance like usual, I came up with a new solution.  I decided to devote 15 minutes and not a minute longer to the project.  It was just a way to get started that eliminated the feeling of overwhelm.  When I did this, I realized that the task was way easier then I thought and the anxiety and procrasination about doing it went right out the window.  I wanted to keep going but I kept my word about only doing it for 15 minutes, so I took a 2 minute break and then finished it.

I’m not claiming to be an expert on procrastination but if you find yourself dealing with the same sort of thing as me, give my method a try and if it works, PLEASE TELL ME ABOUT IT!

Here is the 4 step process broken down:

1. Notice why you are resisting a certain activity

2. Ask yourself what you need to get started

3. Devote a small period of time to take 1 step toward getting the project started

4. Keep your word

Step 4 is really important. If you follow steps 1-3 and you are still having trouble and feeling like crap, make sure you take a break to avoid burning out and getting more frustrated.  Simply take a break, and start over with steps 1-3.

Cheers,

Robbie Kramer

Popularity: 10% [?]