Through the years of developing the Inner Confidence curriculum, we’ve compiled a subconscious list of things that winners do and losers do. There are 10,000 subtle behaviors that add up to someone’s overall success or failure: word choice, behavior, social ecosystem, etc.
We hear the words “winners” and “losers” and don’t pay much attention to them because they sound like generic, silly words. I really like them and think they don’t get enough credit. Most decisions we make, even things we do that we don’t realize are decisions, lead towards a win or a loss. Losers frequently make decisions that head down the loss path, and winners frequently make decisions that head down the win path.
Make an effort to view the world through the lenses of your mentors. Pay attention to what the winners do, and drop your loser habits.
I have a client who told me “I need a game plan,” or something to that effect. 100% of my unsuccessful friends say things like that. I think (but can’t prove) that saying “I need a plan” is an excuse to not do anything. You get to feel okay about your lack of taking action and getting nothing done, because boy oh boy once you have that magical plan you’re gonna tear it up big time!
Cool story bro. Go hit on every girl you see and read everything that’s been suggested; there’s your PLAN. The rest will come later. Fred DeLuca, the founder of Subway, wrote Ready, Fire, Aim, and this perfectly describes both the way Silicon Valley works now, and the way you should be operating in your own life. If you walk into a VC’s office, an angel investor, or you want to bring a partner on board and you ramble about your “plans,” you are going to get laughed at. Everyone understands: just get SOMETHING out, see what people say and do, then start making changes and improvements.
More importantly to the “I need a plan” claim. ZERO POINT ZERO of my successful friends say this, EVER. Winners don’t do this.
If anyone here feels like they’d do better in life with a plan, fine here if you remoter fucking plan- hit on 20 girls per week next 10 weeks. Watch every single “This Week In Startups” with Jason Calacanis, get a 6 pack. Spend 10 hours a week learning about fashion. This PLAN alone will greatly impact your professional/financial life, social life, love life, etc.
Because it doesn’t matter what the plan is, it matters that you act on it.
There is a great saying, “If you want to accomplish something, set a goal and give yourself not enough time.” Deadlines force teams to BANG hard and crank work, it kills distractions, and it makes for productive ecosystems.
If you believe in “The Secret” you are a loser. Evidence: look around you, can you name ONE person that you can verify 100% is not broke or unhappy that believes in The Secret? Now look around yourself and do you know anyone broke that believes in The Secret? Hopeless, unfulfilled, uneducated people who need magical answers because they can’t figure things out themselves turn to all this new age nonsense.
Today, self-help books relentlessly discuss the importance of having a complete plan before you get started, which unfortunately has stretched positive thinking to the point of delusion, as in the nonsense that is The Secret. If you go back a century ago, self-help books emphasized the value of hard work, persistence, and virtue. Sure, self-help books today sell in record numbers, but self-help ideas from a hundred years ago were more accurate about human behavior, and focused on EXECUTION over a plan.
Part of why self-help books sell so well today is that they convince people that they lack something like confidence and if they just had it, then they could finally start going after their goals. So people keep buying more and more books, waiting to feel that perfect plan set up before they actually take action. They don’t realize that if they feel uncomfortable, they’re doing something right!
No one cares what’s holding you back, and they don’t care about your excuses and rationalizations. And there’s no replacement for hard work and discomfort. The secret to success in life isn’t really a secret: pick something and work really hard at it, don’t complain, and ask questions from people who are better than you. At the end of the day, your execution is all that matters.