If everyone likes you, chances are you're struggling with women. What if they don’t like me? What if they think I’m a jerk? What if I make them angry? What if they talk trash behind my back? “I had a realization today,” said Marty, one of my students. “What I realized is that to be successful and confident, not everyone is going to like me… And if I am pushing myself, I will most likely annoy and piss some people off because they may see me as a jerk, creepy or arrogant. But I can’t let that affect how I feel about myself.” Marty had this realization during a particular … [Read more...]
The Secret Ingredient for Lots of Success with Women
Back in the day, I was out with a small group of students at a new bar in west L.A. Prior to going out, we did a bunch of drills to help them get over their approach anxiety and have fun opening conversations. We were using some fairly edgy openers. But all of the guys in attendance had zero approach anxiety by the end of the night, and we all had a great time. How is it possible to say edgy things and deliver risky openers without worrying about what happens afterward? A conversation I had with one of my students who is a little older and less comfortable in bar environments really … [Read more...]
Don’t Make the Mistake of Setting the Wrong Goals
Have you ever gone out to a bar with the goal of getting a phone number, getting a kiss, getting some action or having great interactions? If your answer is “no,” then I know you're a liar! We've all been there and you may be wondering, “What’s wrong with doing that?” When we set a goal and it doesn’t happen, most of us beat ourselves up and decide to try harder next time. Next time rolls around and since we have decided to try harder, now we’re gonna make the goal even tougher and push ourselves even more. It doesn’t happen, and we beat ourselves up again. The problem is not … [Read more...]
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