Why you should be rock climbing (for dating).... I googled ‘rock climbing gym’ then hit images. Notice how many girls are in the images. 18 reasons why you should do this: There are days I’ve gone to a climbing gym and there have been 42 girls and 26 guys. Groups of 2-4 girls often go climbing. Climbing is very social. It’s totally normal for one group of randoms to make friends with another group of randoms. In one session you could in theory talk to 20 people. You could also talk to zer0 if you choose. Both are common. If you meet a girl and she climbs, she’s in shape … [Read more...]
Dealing with discomfort
What I'm about to say is sad, but not very controversial: most people would experience mild discontent with their situation than face the discomfort that’s necessary for improving their lives. People just don't want to tolerate discomfort, even if they have a guarantee it’s temporary. Getting into shape is a prime example. Unhealthy people tend to know that getting into shape requires eating healthy, and physical exercise. The failure to act isn’t caused by a lack of information. It stems from an unwillingness to feel uncomfortable. Eating healthy is uncomfortable. Working out causes … [Read more...]
9 Ways to Create Enough Time and Money for a Quality Dating Life
Recently, I asked for an update from some of my coaching clients in the Leverage Program. I noticed that almost all of the guys who are lagging on the dating front are also worried about their finances. While it’s true that guys often use money as an excuse, I actually do think that it’s hard to get your dating life handled if your finances are also not in order. Financial difficulties are an emotional drain that affects our self-esteem and cause us to project insecurity to everyone around us. The relationship between money and dating is an issue I started to think about in junior … [Read more...]
You Should Dump Your Girlfriend
Guest post by Jay, Leverage Program member It’s easy to fall into the trap of letting a girl who isn’t really a good fit for you stick around because she prevents you from feeling lonely. We all feel lonely at times. It’s part of the human condition. And for guys who aren’t naturally good with women, it’s normal to feel lonely most or even all of the time. When you start developing your skills, having success is inevitable. You’ll start to get numbers, you’ll start to get dates, you’ll start to make out with women, and you’ll start to sleep with ones you like. Once you start … [Read more...]
Bringing Day Game Into Your Everyday Life
Guest post by Patrick, Leverage Program member You’ve read our blog posts on why you should day game, you get the concept, but are you still struggling to connect with girls when you hit on them? The game changer is that you need to start incorporating day game into your everyday life. Luckily for me, I live in New York City, where the opportunities for day game are endless. While it is definitely important to set aside some time to go out and practice day game, especially when you're first starting, your goal should be to incorporate practicing your communication skills on a daily … [Read more...]
If You Play it Safe You’re Boring
When you look at guys who are great with women, or anyone with peak social awareness, they perform a bunch of smaller actions that add up to an arsenal of social skills. These discrete skills combine to form a killer ability to communicate with others and assertively get what they want. When we’re teaching you to improve your dating life, we focus on a lot. Accumulating as much practice as you can and playing the “numbers game” is part of it. Developing your character is also part of it, and it can seem overwhelming to go from where you are now to the success you really dream of. While … [Read more...]
3 Reasons Why You Don’t Do Day Game (even though you know you should) and what you can do about it.
If you’ve been following Inner Confidence, you know that day game is the easiest way to meet high quality women without the hassle of online dating, Tinder, and spending mad cash at bars and clubs. But here’s the thing: If you know about day game, and you still aren’t approaching regularly, odds are that you’re not going to start without making some changes. Here’s why you probably don’t approach: 1. You haven’t reprogrammed the irrational parts of your brain. If you approach 10 girls, 9 reject you, and 1 becomes your girlfriend, you’ll forget about the rejections and whole thing … [Read more...]
Why Your Life Depends On Being Assertive
Like most guys on this journey of self-improvement, one of the hardest things I ever struggled with was overcoming social anxiety. Often I knew how I'd like my life to be different, and I recognized how I'd behave in a world where I had unlimited confidence. Some part of me knew what to do, but anxiety stopped me from doing it. Getting past that anxiety and starting to develop true inner confidence and self-acceptance was tough. And not just tough as in the way our society views hard work, but tough in the way that only comes from challenging who you view yourself as a person. Tough doesn't … [Read more...]
Why You Aren’t Making Enough Mistakes
We all know the cliches about how you fail your way to success, or how you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. It’s common knowledge in our culture that the way you get better at something is by making mistakes. But is it really? A lot of guys don’t realize that they’re looking for dating coach because they’re looking for permission to make mistakes. They might “know” that they need to make mistakes to get better, but they don’t actually believe it. They get a coach because they want someone else to tell them it's ok to mess up. One area where this shows itself is when guys are too … [Read more...]
I Don’t Ever Lie
Bella DePaulo, Ph.D. has conducted research that shows how typical humans lie in one out of every five daily interactions. The type of lies we tell isn't really important. What is important is to consider the ways we can’t help but cushion the truth. It’s common for guys to only tell parts of the truth, and leave out the less desirable details because they're afraid of difficult conversations. So why do we do it? Lies occur for many reasons. Lying by omission, for instance, is often done to spare someone's feelings from being hurt. Exaggeration and self-protection lies would be done in … [Read more...]