I absolutely love when a man goes on excited and spirited tangents about things. It could be something as significant as the global water crisis or something as simple as how annoying your love/hate relationship with autocorrect is. It may sound strange, but intelligence and passion are huge big draws for my attention.
On the contrary – they could just have the glittery-eyed expression when they explain things to me and realize that I get it. Most people tend to get frustrated and embarrassed explaining things, but I see patience and the ability to express ones self in a passionate way as a virtue that I can learn from and a skill that you should have. Some of our clients can struggle with lack of emotion and in certain situations so to I, so don’t feel alone if it doesn’t come naturally to you, either. However, it is your choice to do something about it – so push yourself to fake it until it feels natural and don’t make any more excuses about it. Yes…learning is sexy!
Certain ways they make eye contact
When, where and how you make eye contact with me matters. A weird look or a look that lingered too long can really mess up a moment. In general, you want to pay attention to the looks you’re giving. Not only that, realize that you can also influence the direction of a conversation pretty heavily with looks – a look of curiosity, a mischievous look, a look that insinuates you’re thinking something and wont tell her playfully… You get the idea. I can get very easily excited from a flirty look.
Whispering right in my ear
Whether it’s done in bed or while we’re out in public, a quiet whisper or breathing a little too close to the inside of my ear turns me on almost no matter who I’m speaking to – it’s quite disturbing, actually.
When they “clear my head,” freeing me to enjoy being in the moment
Look, bitches be crazy. Sometimes, we “get inside our own heads.” Yeah, yeah, I know that statement in and of itself is annoying and even nonsensical, but it’s true. Robbie and Justin are the true geniuses on how to accomplish this – getting a girl to calm down in a hypnotic fashion, that is. But, when it happens… It’s such a freeing, lovely feeling. Puts me in an open, playful mood.
Being Told What to Do (once mutual attraction is established)
If I like a guy and that’s already been established, I love it when he takes the lead and acts as boss. I’ll even let him boss me around… not in a mean or demanding way, but in a direct, “I know I can trust him” kind of way. It’s so attractive and such a comforting feeling…it alleviates responsibility from me, which lets me look *up* to him. This is the only position a girl should be in when dealing with you.
When I was younger, I used to think that I wanted to be the boss in the relationship the smartest one, the winner wearing the pants. Some guys let this happen and you know what? Once I achieved those things and did win, I got bored and moved onto the next guy who was…. you guessed it, a challenge. I was too young and naive to realize that by taking the lead, my guy will only become less and less attractive to me over time. It’s a death sentence on a relationship, and I’ve seen it happen dozens of times to all of my friends!
Don’t let her get bored. I still like to be the smartest fastest boss in every other facet of my life… It’s the guy who I can’t exactly conquer who holds on to my line of interest and attention.
The boxer flash
This is simply an elementary move in which a guy lifts his arm (his muscly, toned arm… remember 😉 ), pulling his shirt up revealing a flash of his upper boxer lining that usually reads Calvin Klein, Armani, 2Xist, etc. Also, the shot of his lower abdomen is equally hot.
This tactic is especially useful when one is in shape… again, getting excited just writing about it!
This is self-explanatory. Exfoliate, guys. Use a loofa or something abrasive in the shower – your hands and/or a washcloth are not coarse enough to make you smooth OR get you clean enough either, in my humble opinion.
A Clean, “Woman-Friendly” Apartment
If your apartment is a mess, grungy, has any weird smells or is too “bachelory”…it’s a turn off. Clean, modern apartments with clean sheets and a clean bathroom (toilet especially) will make me want to come back to your place and hang out more!
Fun little knickknacks around the house are nice, too… One guy I dated had a bobblehead of himself that someone gave him as a gift… I thought it was a riot. That guy’s house was always constantly stocked with Costco-sized portions of all kinds of food, toiletry products, cleaning products, etc… so any time anything needed to be cleaned or prepared, I felt good about stepping up as the “woman” of the house to cook/clean.
If that stuff isn’t there to begin with, how is she going to do any of this in the first place? Don’t you have expectations of what a girl’s apartment should look, smell and feel like? The same standards apply to men. It definitely makes me feel attractive cooking for my guy the next morning, and then cleaning up too, so make sure you’re place has all the basic household essentials to work with. This tends to apply to more of a dating situation as opposed to a first or second date, obviously.
Boss me around in bed. THIS IS BIG
For how much I like to be bossed around in everyday interactions, you can times that by ten to the tenth power when we’re talking about the bedroom. However, it’s very important to start slow and get to know how your girl likes to be spoken to and pleased first…which will let you know how and to what extent she can be directed or bossed around in bed.
If you initiate it too quickly, it’ll look like an act or a routine that you do every time. Make it feel personalized to her – by asking her questions about what she likes, doesn’t like, how this feels, how that feels… and based upon how she’s going to answer – your level of command and leadership should reflect that.
She should only tell you what she wants or likes if you ask her. Otherwise, tell her no. Then do it at your discretion only. And once again, I’m talking about in bed, in a sex situation only.
Any time I’m made to “feel small”
Every girl likes to be picked up, thrown around, made to feel like you’re stronger than her. She might fight at the time and turn it into a competitive thing, but we all do that. We don’t want to admit it, but we love feeling the strength of a man as a reminder of our own physical inferiority in terms of size.
Money (you don’t need to be rich, but you CAN’T be cheap)
I saved this one for last for a reason. Look, money is attractive. That being said, you don’t need to be wealthy or rich, but you can’t be cheap. If a guy doesn’t have the basics: decent car, clean apartment in decent neighborhood, a career or career goal (if he’s in upper schooling), attractive clothing, at least one or two suits, a good pair of sunglasses, cool shoes, a computer and a smartphone…. he’s not yet a MAN, in my opinion. These are all things that an ADULT MAN should have.
You should be able to pay for dinner 7 times out of 10, and be able to spend a reasonable amount of money to do fun stuff together while you’re getting to know her. However, she should also offer to pay herself from time to time and go out of her way to do things for you, too. If she’s not appreciative, doesn’t notice and/or doesn’t reciprocate or at least say thank you over an extended period of time – drop her.
That’s all for now…