123: Start w/ No, The Secret To Persuasion & Negotiation
Intro:
In this episode, Robbie interviews Leverage Tribe Leader, Nicholas Smith, a Chiropractor by trade and lifelong student of sales and persuasion, who has been party to over 100,000 interactions with patients; helping them to achieve a healthier back and spine.
This podcast takes a deep dive into the strange but all-too-common phenomenon of why people often say “Yes” when they really mean “No” and how to circumvent this annoying occurrence in the areas of sales, dating and negotiation
Show Notes:
How do people make decisions? Are we motivated by facts and research, or emotions? (02:00)
How the book “Start w/ No” by Jim Camp lead Nick to question the status quo on persuasion. (03:00)
Why we’re addicted to saying “Yes” and why it’s really a trap… (04:40)
What is a “yes-ladder” and do they actually work? (06:00)
A quick lesson in Evolutionary Biology on the Amygdala and why this almond shaped portion of our brain contains four times the processing tissue for fear vs. pleasure… and the important implications… (07:40)
A story of a man with an Amygdala that doesn’t process fear… (10:15)
What is a “Counterfeit Yes” and why avoiding it is the first step towards persuasion… (13:00)
An example of how a “Counterfeit Yes” can wreak havoc on your business… (14:45)
What “No” really means…” (16:45)
How to use a “No” to get a table at a busy restaurant without waiting… (20:00)
Why it’s important for people to execute their right of refusal for protection and safety… (23:45)
What we can learn from kids about “No”… (24:00)
The first thing you need to do before getting to a “No” when approaching women during the day… (26:30)
“What Everybody is Saying” by Joe Navarro – how to avoid the trap of focusing so much on labeling cues, that we end up missing them… (27:30)
What is a negotiation, really… (29:00)
Using “Tactical Empathy” for talking an irate buddy off the ledge… (30:00)
The key to labeling people’s feelings. Do this right and you get to connection, do this wrong and you make them more upset. (34:40)
How to get someone to see that their behavior is suboptimal and actually change it! No matter how blind to it stubborn they have been in the past. (37:30)
How to practice these distinctions in a world where it’s so easy to fall back into the typical style that doesn’t work… (41:30)
The long term ramifications of remaining a low status male. (47:00)
Links:
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Thank you for tuning in, and I look forward to helping you build your inner confidence and achieve success!
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